MOMentous Monday is my way of reaching more of you in hope that you would not feel alone. On MOMentous Mondays I turn the mic over to someone who has a story I think you need to hear. I only have so much to offer and so many life experiences to share. However, I am surrounded with beautiful women with amazing stories of trial, struggle, and redemption. I am determined to use this space to bless more women with the bravely shared stories of others.
This blog is not about me, it is for us.
Today, I am honored to share my space with a woman from my home town. Her name is Jenny and I am a huge fan. I did not know the gravity of Jenny’s story until I asked if she would be willing to share on a MOMentous Monday. She is brave. She is strong. She is resilient. Jenny, Thank you for sharing your hurt and your hope.
No one’s life is perfect and I’m sharing part of my imperfect life.
Hi I’m Jenny, I’ve been married for almost 15 years! I’m a mom to 2 children and have also been a surrogate mom. I come from a divorced family, shocker right?
Not in the United States where our divorce rate is 50% ! My Dad has been married 4 times and my Mom 3 times. I have a very blended family with 2 half sisters, 3 step brothers, and 2 step sisters.
( I just tell everyone I have 3 sisters and a brother, they are the siblings I grew up with.)
I don’t like the word step, they are and have been my family since I was young.
My biological mom suffers from Bi-Polar Disorder. I was told as a young teen that she became more manic after she gave birth to me (at 36yrs old).
That was very painful to hear and has stuck with me ever since.
Neither my sister nor I like the word mother, it’s like nails on a chalkboard as my bio mom would force herself on us saying, “This is your Mother.”
My relationship with her has been mostly by phone since she lives in another state. I mail her gifts and cards but I’ve only seen her 4 times in 26 years. She’s seen my 14 year old daughter when she was a week old and has never seen my 11 year old son. She wasn’t there for my graduation, my wedding or the birth of my children. I love my biological mom but her illness has negatively affected her my whole life.
However, I’m so thankful to God that he gave me my other Mom and that she was there for me.
I started calling my Dad’s 3rd wife my mom around 9 years old (they married when I was 4 or 5). I hate the title “step mom.” She said the day I called her mom was her best day! We had a great relationship for the most part. I wanted and needed a mom in my life and I am soo thankful for her.
Unfortunately, as much as she says I’m glad your my daughter, it has ALWAYS felt different. As a step-child I noticed how I wasn’t always treated the same as her other 2 children from a previous marriage. She and my dad divorced when I was in my mid 20’s and things have never been the same, she lost my trust. We don’t talk as much and that hurts. She was my mom, my mom figure in my life.
Sometimes I wonder why couldn’t my life have just been normal?
I will forever be grateful to my step mom. I’m blessed to have had someone step up and be a Mom to me, even if it was for a season of my life.
I don’t blame my biological mom and I feel badly that my kids don’t even know her, but it’s been such a complicated situation.
Because of my experience… I want to be there for my kids and I don’t take a day for granted with my family. I tell my kids multiple times a day how much I love them. I want them to be able to say my mom was the best mom. My family spends as much time as we can with my dad and sisters. We’re all getting older and aren’t promised tomorrow. I love all of my family even if we don’t talk or see each other very often, we all need to remember to tell our loved ones that as much as possible.
I know I am not alone, so many people don’t have a mom or dad in their lives, whether it being from them passing or divorce. Only God can get us through it!
If any of you sweet readers out there have a story you’d be willing to share… I would love to have you.
Let’s continue to give pain a purpose by blessing people with our stories.
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