I stay at home because I want to — It’s a privilege, not a burden.

Overworked and Underpaid
Exhausted and Sleep Deprived
Wearer of many hats… Chef, Maid, Nurse, Chauffeur, etc


Sacrificed my career
Gave up my dreams
Lost my identity


Can’t pee alone
Can’t do anything in a hurry
Can’t remember to shower


Hear me when I say I get it.
I am a Stay-At-Home-Mom.
I was raised by a SAHM and I find myself daily surrounded by other SAHMs.
I feel like I have a bit of ground to stand on for this one and I am a little fired up.

I get that it’s a hard, stressful, overwhelming and usually thankless job.

I know what it is like to be covered in yesterdays bodily fluids.
I know what it’s like to be sleep deprived.
I have prayed many nights that my baby would just burp and sleep before we both tumble out of the rocking chair.

I get it. Seriously.

But what I don’t get is how this is a burden…

This all started when in front of me and a crowd… Shane was asked, “Does your wife work?”

Shane’s response, “No she stays home.”

Shane’s answer was 100% accurate and I was 100% NOT offended,

The man went on to joke about how he set him up to score points with me…
Stay-at-home-moms have the hardest job in the world… blah, blah, blah.

Shane agreed that I work very hard and apologized for his answer.

Apology unnecessary!

He doesn’t need to give some cliche answer to earn points.
This is a marriage not tennis match.

And the bottom line really is the fact…
I stay at home because I want to.

That really could be the end of the story… but let me elaborate.

I chose to have children.
I went to college.
I have a degree.
I could go get a “real” job.

But remember… I stay home because I want to and to add to that… I consider it a privilege.

Is it hard? Duh.

Are there some days where I feel like running away? Sure. (That’s what the closet is for.)

Are there times when simultaneously getting a root canal and a colonoscopy seems less painful? Yep.
(And you are welcome for that visual.)

Are you ready for another truth? It might make you feel a little awkward… here goes…
I can stay home because we can.

It is a choice and a privilege.

There was a time when I was a single mom and couldn’t imagine being married, owning a home, and being financially able to stay home.

That said… I have friends that have to work and I have friends that choose to work.

To my friends that have to work… I feel ya. I missed a lot firsts and milestones and cuddles. But sometimes you just have to.

To my friends that choose to work. More power to ya. We all have different ways of doing this mom thing. I am proud of those who represent women in the workforce.

And to my fellow SAHMs…
Let’s stop the whining.
Stop complaining.
Stop the grumbling.
Stop the self-absorbed focus. (you know… like, when you are complaining about how selfless your life is)

Let’s start enjoying and embracing the life we have chosen.

I have thrown myself a SAHM pity party from time to time. I seated myself at the head of the table and toasted all of sacrifices.

Then I was quickly reminded of how freaking blessed I am.

I get to stay home. It’s not a prison, jail cell, or life sentence.
It was/is my choice.

I love staying home.
I love what I do.
I love watching these little people grow up before my very eyes.

I am not sure what I or God will do with my whole life… But for now I am enjoying the privilege of being a stay-at-home-momma.

I would love to hear some opinions on this one…
Do you work?
Do you stay home?

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0 thoughts on “I stay at home because I want to — It’s a privilege, not a burden.

  1. I believe we have to build on our strengths and kick guilt to the curb. The best thing I did was to finally go back to work after being home for 3 months with my kids. My time management skills kicked into high gear and that made me a better mom. Is it for everyone? No but with a boss who put family first (Thank You God!) I didn’t miss much. I have two very loving, compassionate, hardworking and flexible adult children that I couldn’t be more proud of and a new baby granddaughter who is lucky to have a SAHM! Life has a way of working itself out.

  2. Loved your blog today! Want to say so much but think I should just leave you with this… Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16

  3. Thank you- there is a somewhat constant guilt when staying at home is not necc a choice and I have had moms tell me that “I(or my hubs and I) could make it work” financially “if I wanted too.” !!!! They do not know our burdens and I just wish mamas would stop beating each other up! Now, that being said- I am starting to see how being a working mama helps me to be a better mama(for ME) SOME days! Lol – it really is about balance no matter what you choose- or what choices you might not have 😉 one thing is for sure- we are all privileged with the little lives we are blessed with!- the ones who call us “mama” and love us unconditionally! <3