FaKebook Friday — Sailing Edition

Bickering, Barfing, and Boats... OH MY!

All these lovely posts about perfect family adventures and Pinterest worthy meals make me wonder about the story behind them.  You know, the version of the story we don’t broadcast on the WWW.

So I came up with the concept of sharing some of our behind the post dramas.

I call it FaKebook.

FaKebook is the version of the story that you want everyone to see or know and Real Life is the version of the same story that you don’t really share for whatever reason…

It’s been a while… but this FaKebook is sure to please! Here goes…

{FaKebook Version}

Great day sailing to Santa Monica Pier with Grandpa Sean. We saw dolphins, sea lions, pelicans, and cranes. Such a fun day full of memories.





{Real Life Version}

The kids really did have an awesome time! They got to take turns at the wheel and learned about tacking and jibing.


They were pretty proud of themselves.


(Don’t mind the sweet tattoos, Brady couldn’t stand the fact that mom was getting fake tattoos and he wasn’t. And of course, he chose the placing.)

But after a while it was old hat and the giant boat seemed to close in on them.

They got restless.

Then cold.

Then bored.

And that’s when they started picking at one another.

There was plenty of

he’s touching me,

he’s hogging the blanket,

 and are we there yet?


So it seemed like a great time to whip out some snacks.

Grandpa Sean brought cheese, salami, and crackers out.

They were delicious and we inhaled them.

I volunteered to make the second plate.

As soon as I went below deck I hit me.

I got disoriented and felt drunk (I mean, I am assuming that is what it would feel like to be in such a state, eh hem.)

The diesel fumes, dark room, and rocking were all too much.

I went back up on deck for fresh air.

I was feeling fine… just playing referee for Thing 1 and Thing 2.

They seemed to settle into some form of peace so I went and laid down to rest.

This was my view… gorgeous. As I was laying there, I couldn’t help but marvel at God’s glory.


Then I stood up.

Not good.

Not good at all.

It was coming.

All of it, in all it’s glory…

I made it to the back of stern of the boat and my father-in-law made me sit down.
(Judging by the look on his face… I must have looked as badly as I felt.)

I sat there for less than two minutes when I started calling the dinosaurs.

It was rough and I don’t know if I will ever eat salami again.

However… thanks to my salami experience… I know I will never forget the trip.

In fact… I think about it anytime I see/smell sausage, pepperoni, prosciutto, or any other cured meats for that matter.


In all fairness… It really was a great day.

We got to see some beautiful ocean life, take turns steering a 20,000 lb boat, and learned a bit about sailing.


Nothing says “love” like a barfy/salami kiss! Sorry P! (And are those crows feet?!?! Oh man! I am getting old!)

To say that I was happy to be back on land would be an understatement… but I survived and still managed to get off the boat with a sense of humor.


To finish the day off, we went to dinner afterward… You can imagine, so don’t even ask!


But there you have it… The Real Life Version of the story. The version that doesn’t usually make the Facebook highlight reel. The FaKebook Version is fine and all… but the Real Life Version really tells the story!

Thanks for stopping by my little corner of the internet, I hope I didn’t gross you out too badly… if you can handle more of my crazy antics…click here and like my Facebook page… you know you don’t never miss an excuse to feel better about yourself at my expense.

Also, I know your email box is sacred and you have worked ever so diligently to protect it like a mother bird protecting her young…  but I really think you should leave your email address in the subscribe bar.

I cross my heart I won’t abuse being including in your circle of trust… I won’t spam you, I won’t sell your information, I just don’t want you to miss a thing! 

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

Leave a Reply

One thought on “FaKebook Friday — Sailing Edition